佚名/Anonymous
It is said that the true nature of being is veiled.The labor of wor ds,the expression of art,the seemingly ceaseless buzz that is human th ought all have in common the need to get at what really is so.The hope to draw close to and possess the truth of being can be a feverish one.I n some cases it can even be fatal.if pleasure is one's truth and its at tainment more important than life itself.In other lives,though,the se arch for what is truthful gives life.
I used to find notes left in the collection basket,beautiful notes about my homilies and about the writer's thoughts on the daily scriptura l readings.The person who penned the notes would add reflections to my thoughts and would always include some quotes from poets and mystics he or she had read and remembered and loved.The notes fascinated me.Here was someone immersed in a search for truth and beauty.Words had been tr easured,words that were beautiful.And I felt as if the words somehow d elighted in being discovered,for they were obviously very generous to t he as yet anonymous writer of the notes.And now this person was in turn learning the secret of sharing them.Beauty so shines when given away.T he only truth that exists is,in that sense,free.
It was a long time before I met the author of the notes.
One Sunday morning,I was told that someone was waiting for me in th e office.The young person who answered the rectory door said that it wa s "the woman who said she left all the notes." When I saw her I was shoc ked,since I immediately recognized her from church but had no idea that it was she who wrote the notes.She was sitting in a chair in the office with her hands folded in her lap.Her head was bowed and when she raised it to look at me,she could barely smile without pain.Her face was disf igured,and the skin so tight from surgical procedures that smiling or l aughing was very difficult for her.She had suffered terribly from treat ment to remove the growths that had so marred her face.
We for a while that Sunday morning and agreed to meet for lunch late r that week.
As it turned out we went to lunch several times,and she always wore a hat during the meal.I think that treatments of some sort had caused a lot of her hair to fall out.We shared things about our lives.I told he r about my schooling and growing up.She told me that she had worked for years for an insurance company.She never mentioned family,and I did no t ask.
We spoke of authors we both had read,and it was easy to tell that b ooks are a great love of hers.
I have thought about her often over the years and how she struggled in a society that places an incredible premium on looks,class,wealth a nd all the other fineries of life.She suffered from a disfigurement tha t cannot be made to look attractive.I know that her condition hurt her deeply.
Would her life have been different had she been pretty?Chances are it would have.And yet there were a sensitivity and a beauty to her that had nothing to do with looks.She was one to be listened to,whose words were so easy to take to heart.Her words came from a wounded but loving heart,very much like all hearts,but she had more of a need to be aware of it,to live with it and learn from it.She possessed a fine-tuned sen se of beauty.Her only fear in life was the loss of a friend.
How long does it take most of us to reach that level of human growth,if we ever get there?We get so consumed and diminished,worrying abou t all the things that need improving,we can easily forget to cherish th ose things that last.Friendship,so rare and so good,just needs our ca re--maybe even the simple gesture of writing a little note now and then,or the dropping of some beautiful words in a basket,in the hope that su ch beauty will be shared and taken to heart.
The truth of her life was a desire to see beyond the surface for a g limpse of what it is that matters.She found beauty and grace and they b efriended her,and showed her what is real.
人們說，人生的真諦是神秘莫測的。言語的加工、藝術的表達，以及人類那似乎永無休止、被稱為思想的爭論都是在追求人生的真諦。人們狂熱地渴望靠近真理，把握真諦。在某些情況下，如果人們把追求快樂當做真理，並且認為結局比生活本身更重要，那麽這種渴望就甚至是致命的。
過去我常會在教堂的心意籃中發現一些小便條，上麵有關於我的布道的議論，還有一些是作者平時讀《聖經》的感想。便條的作者總是對我的想法發表一些自己的感想，同時還引用了一些他/她曾讀過的、所喜愛的詩人或神秘主義者那些令人難忘的話語。這些短文深深地吸引了我，我看到了一個執著追求真與美的人，這些珍藏的話語優美且感人。我有種感覺，這些字句好像很高興被發現，因為很明顯這是便條的匿名作者慷慨留下的，而且這位神秘的作者也知道有人在秘密地與其分享便條上的美文。當美麗向外散發的時候，是如此熠熠生輝。從這個意義上講，世界上隻有一個真理，那就是無價的。
很久以後，我才看到這些美文的作者。
一個周日早上，我被告知辦公室有人等我。給我應門的年輕人說：“是個女士，她說留言是她放的。”見到她時，我不禁大吃一驚，因為我一下子就認出了她是我教區的信徒，隻是我始終不知道那些美文是出自她手。她坐在椅子上，雙手相握放在大腿上，頭低垂著。她抬頭看我時，微笑起來卻十分費力。那是一張變形的臉，外科手術使她的臉皮緊繃，笑對她來說是非常困難的事。為了去除臉上眼的肉瘤，她接受了令人痛苦的手術治療。
那個周日的早上，我們聊了一會兒，並商量好那周再找個時間共進午餐。
而後我們不止吃了一頓午飯，而是吃了好多頓，每次她都頭戴帽子，我想或許是某種治療使她脫了好多發。我們將各自生活中的點點滴滴講出來一起分享。我向她講述了我讀書和成長的故事，她告訴我，她在一家保險公司工作了好多年，但她從未提及她的家庭，我也就沒過問。
我們還談及了大家都讀過的一些文章的作者，顯然她是一個酷愛讀書的人。
這些年我常會想起她，在這個追求容貌、地位、財富以及其他一切浮華的殘酷社會中，她是怎樣一路掙紮著走過的呢？損毀的容貌無論如何也無法使她變得魅力四射，我知道這對她是個巨大的打擊。
如果她外表美麗，她的生命能否會是另一番情形呢？或許會的。她的身上有一種與外表無關的靈氣和美，她是用來傾聽的，她的文字很容易穿透人的靈魂。她的雋語來自於一顆受過傷害卻滿懷愛意的心——如所有人的心一樣，隻是她比別人更關注自己的心靈，更關注專心體會生活，並從中學習獲得提高。她有一種細膩的美，她生命中唯一懼怕的就是失去朋友。
如此高度的成熟我們要花費多長時間才能達到呢？最終能否真正達到還不得而知。我們總是身心俱疲，懷才不遇，隻擔心眼前的不足，卻忽視了那些經久不衰的東西。友誼珍貴且美好，要我們用心去嗬護，有時簡單的暗示便已足夠了。比如偶爾給朋友寫幾句話，或把一些感人的美文寫在便條上投入籃子裏，供大家分享，讓大家一起記住這美妙時刻的美好感覺。
她生命的真諦便是對越過浮華，窺探生命本質的一種渴望。她發現了美和慈愛，而美和慈愛也把她當做朋友，把生命的真諦展現給她。