佚名/Anonymous
At the age of 13, my life had appeared to have fallen apart. The recent death of my grandmother, the sadness and depression of my mother, and the surprise reunion of my birth mother sent me into a complete sense of loss, confusion and sadness.
I grew up in a family of major control. Both parents were European and“too proud”to seek help when the family almost fell apart several times. I felt the only thing that I could control was what I ate and most importantly—didn't eat. In one day I would consume a bag of popcorn and then let it carry me for the rest of the week!
I had people comment on how great I looked.“You are so lucky—you look so thin!”I honestly didn't even realize what I was doing and the consequences it had and would have on my maturing body.
I eventually had blackouts and one day I landed on the curbside while on a walk with my parents. My mother yelled at me and asked,“Are you pregnant?”I yelled back when I finally came to and replied,“Of course not! I need a boyfriend for that type of event to occur.”Needless to say, my mother didn't think my comment was funny at all!
I blacked out many times after that in the hallway at school, at home and other places. I later started to suffer from migraines, which would last for many years. The lack of food would often trigger a migraine. My health would only become much worse.
I felt good when I didn't eat and found that whenever I was under great stress, I wouldn't eat. I spent many times growing up in my home alone. I know I have huge issues of abandonment, loss and control in my life. These are the core issues to my anorexia. I don't think of this word at all as describing my“non-eating”time in my life. It was in the mid to late 80's when I first met my boyfriend's cousin. We met at his parents' home. She was eating a pizza slice. While watching her eat, I started to recognize myself through her in the way she ate the pizza. It felt really strange to watch her hide most of what she chewed in her napkin for no one else to see. That was me! I identified with her completely! I was relieved to see that there was someone else out there like me. I didn't even notice how terribly thin she was until I saw a photo of her about a year later. She was hospitalized and was in serious condition! She lived out of town, so we only saw her once in a while.
It hit really home to me. I knew that if I kept on my continued path this would beat me. This really shocked and scarred me, and it was the turning point in my life for me. I felt as if she was an angel for me; right there in front of me to warn me of what might happen to me if I continued. I was really lucky.
While at a doctor's visit, my physician warned me that my poor health had much to do with my lack of body fat and my severe thinness. I know she was right. Unfortunately, due to the stress of getting married, I ended up losing another 10 pounds before my wedding.
Right after the wedding, I was diagnosed with very late stages of cervical dysphasia. It had to be treated with surgery. This prompted me to start looking closely at my other health issues. I looked to the complementary care field and decided to go back to school. I earned a degree as a Registered Nutritional Consulting Practitioner and began consulting others in the field of nutrition. I have learned what you feed your cells will help feed the mind and body. I began doing many healing modalities. Simultaneously, I really focused on working through my issues. I know I have come a very long way in my journey of healing.
I have been migraine free for just over 7 years now. I take care of myself! It is working.
Now I have an 8-year-old and almost a 17-month old children. I know what I do will greatly affect my children. What I teach them but most importantly what I do will affect their body images, self-confidence and their love for themselves. I was greatly affected by my role models.
I still struggle and have to remind myself to eat. When I get stressed I will sometimes forget. I have told my closet friends what I have gone through and they remind me to eat and take care of myself whenever they see me slip. They are the greatest! But my kids are the greatest and they are always there to remind me every day. I always make a conscious effect to eat all meals together whenever possible. I think this is really very important for them to see their Mom eat well.
It's a life process. Ironically, I probably have 5～10 pounds to lose after the birth of my second child. I just don't sweat it now. I never weigh myself anymore, and I know that it is important. I just go by how I feel and look in my clothes or lack of them! I used to think—to be perfect—I must lose that weight; those 5 pounds have to go. Now I think it doesn't matter.
I AM perfect the way I am.
13岁那年，我的生活仿佛就快要崩溃了。外婆刚刚去世、母亲悲伤沮丧、我与生身母亲的离奇团聚，所有的这一切让我感到悲哀困惑，不知道该何去何从。
我在一个家教非常严谨的家庭中长大。父母都是欧洲人，他们曾若干次努力将濒临破裂的家庭挽救了回来，这是他们最骄傲的。我觉得，只有我吃什么是自己可以做主的事情，而最重要的是不吃什么。我可以在一天内吃掉一包爆米花，而后撑过这周余下的日子。
我听到有人说我长得好看。“你看上去真苗条！你真幸运！”而我甚至没有意识到，曾经做了些什么，对我正在发育的身体造成或将会造成怎样的影响。
我的身体终于支撑不住了。有一天，我和父母一起散步时，我晕倒在路边。母亲大呼小叫地问道：“你怀孕了吗？”我醒过来后，便大声回答她说：“当然没有，除非我有了男朋友，不然那事不会发生。”显然，对于我的回答，母亲觉得一点都不可笑。
之后，我多次晕倒在学校的走廊、家里或其他的地方。后来我又患上了困扰多年的偏头痛，还经常会因缺乏食物而发病。我的健康状况也越来越令人担忧。
当我不吃东西时就感觉不错，压力过大时，我也不想吃东西。从小到大，在家中多数时间我都是独自度过的。我知道抛弃、损失和控制是我生活的大问题，而这些都是我厌食的关键。我不愿意用这些词来描述生活中不进食的日子。第一次见到男友的表妹是在80年代中后期，我们是在男友父母的家中相遇的，当时她正在吃比萨。看着她吃比萨的样子，我仿佛看到了自己的影子。她以为没人看见，便把嚼过的大部分比萨藏在餐巾纸里。看到这一切我有一种奇怪的感觉：那就是我！从她的身上我完全看清了自己！看到不止我一个人这样，我便松了口气。我甚至没注意到她瘦得多么可怕，直到一年后看到她的一张照片。当时，她的病情很严重，正在医院接受治疗。后来我们只是偶尔才能看到她，因为她住到了镇外。
这件事深深地触动了我。我明白，如果再继续以前的那种生活方式，我也会病倒。这真的让我很震惊，很心痛，而我的生活也从此发生了转变。我真的很幸运，对我来说她就像天使，走在前面对我发出警告，假如我继续下去就会出现同样的结果。
有一次，医生警告我说，我的健康状况很差，原因就是我体内脂肪过少而且严重消瘦。她说得很对，我明白这一点。但不幸的是，结婚的压力导致我在婚礼之前又瘦了10磅。
刚刚结束婚礼，我就被诊断为晚期宫颈疾病，必须做手术。这使得我对其他健康问题也开始密切关注。我看了有关医护方面的完整书籍，决定重返校园。我拿到了注册营养咨询师的学位，开始给他人做营养咨询。我懂得了细胞所摄取的营养会对大脑和身体的营养供给提供帮助。我真正地集中精力来解决自己的问题，并开始做多种康复运动。我明白在康复的路上我已经走出了很远。
如今我的偏头痛已经7年没有发作了。我可以照顾好自己，还很有成效。
我现在有两个孩子，大的8岁，小的快17个月了。我知道自己会给孩子带来很大的影响。我的言行无疑将会影响到他们的形体、自信和自爱等方面。因此，我的榜样角色也极大地影响着我自己。
我依然提醒自己要在进食这方面下功夫。但有时在重压下我还是会忘记吃东西。我把自己曾经的经历告诉了好朋友，他们无论何时看到我忘记吃东西，都会提醒我并让我照顾好自己。他们对我真好，但我的孩子们对我也很好，他们每天都在时刻提醒我。我总是尽可能地和家人一起吃饭，让孩子看到妈妈在好好吃饭，我认为这对他们来说非常重要。
这就是生活的过程。可我的第二个孩子出生后，我又瘦了5至10磅，这真是够讽刺的。如今我不会为此汗颜，因为我知道关键是我不再称体重，而只是在穿衣和脱衣时欣赏感受一下。我过去通常会想，为了完美我必须减肥，那5磅就不得不被减掉。但如今我觉得这没什么。
用自己的方式，我使自己完美。
记忆填空
1.I grew up in a____________of major control. Both parents were European and“too____________”to seek help when the family almost fell apart____________times. I felt the only____________that I could control was what I ate and most importantly—didn't____________.
2.I blacked out many times____________that in the hallway at school, at home and other____________. I later started to suffer from migraines, which would____________for many years. The lack of____________would often trigger a migraine. My health would____________become much worse.
佳句翻译
1.我觉得，只有我吃什么是自己可以做主的事情，而最重要的是不吃什么。
译___________________________________________________
2.我知道抛弃、损失和控制是我生活的大问题，而这些都是我厌食的关键。
译___________________________________________________
3.我过去通常会想，为了完美我必须减肥，那5磅就不得不被减掉。但如今我觉得这没什么。
译___________________________________________________
短语应用
1.I grew up in a family of major control.
grow up：成长，逐渐形成
造___________________________________________________
2.While at a doctor's visit, my physician warned me that my poor health had much to do with my lack of body fat and my severe thinness.
lack of：没有，缺乏；不足，不够
造___________________________________________________